Open Letter to Mother Nature
Dear Mother Nature,
We've had some good times together, right? You had the grace not to rain on my wedding, and have given us some lovely summers at the beach. The winters, I deal with- I know that's my burden to bear for choosing to live in Maine. So in the winter months, I clench my jaw, wake up an hour early, and go shovel out the damn driveway so I can inch my way to work. I accept that.
But seriously? I'm done. Why is it you keep choosing to dump mind boggling piles of snow on me on Sunday nights? Do you not think my Monday mornings are quite joyous enough? Do you snicker while I swear out in the driveway, coffee-less, and falling on my rear in the snow just so I can start my week off wet, cold and generally pissed off? And seriously, do you really have to do this in March, while I'm carrying the emergency work pager, so every single person I work with can call me at the butt-crack of dawn and tell me they're not coming in to work? Seriously?!
So now I will humbly grovel for your mercy. Please, no more. One more shovel full of snow on a Monday morning, and I may go postal......